It's that time of year. Yes, it's the holidays, but that's not what I'm talking about. It's that time when I stress out because everything I've put off catches up to me. It's that time when I start to question who I am, what I'm doing, and why I bother with any of it. I haven't had much time to post lately. It seems like I'm either really busy or laying around sick when I should be really busy instead. I feel like I've been sick since October. I'm not used to having things like colds and sinus infections and the corresponding stomach misery that goes with all of it. Now I have my own little germ factory to keep me in touch with all the nasty viruses floating around. It's been a tough semester with all of it. I knew parenthood would be a new adventure but I didn't anticipate all of the details. Just providing daily care and entertainment is exhausting enough without all of the mind games that comes with it. I daily feel like I'm in a tug-of-war between work, school, parenthood, church, etc. When I'm working I feel guilty for not being with Charlie. When I'm with Charlie I can't fully enjoy it because I'm worried about everything else that needs to be done. Even as I type this Charlie is in his exersaucer because I have to get papers graded but he thinks he needs to stick his pacifier in the VCR. Now I feel guilty that I put him in his exersaucer while I'm blogging. Sometimes I just want to throw everything out and just be a good mom to my baby without having to worry about a million other things at the same time! I know you've been there!
P.S. I'm feeling a little overwhlemed--can you tell?
7 comments:
I've been there and I am there now! Girl, I feel your pain. With going back to work looming over my head and Christmas shopping to do and trying to have a moments peace without washing bottles/feeding/changing/holding a screaming baby, I understand where you are! What am I going to do when she starts crawling like Charlie?! I need to come over and get a dose of reality of my near future! Hope you get to feeling better and that you get time to get stuff done. And don't feel guilty...sometimes I think kiddos need time away from us sometimes too!
Every day gets so much busier and harder and so much more blessed. Iw am with you totally. I love Charlie so much. He is the greatest!
Just always remember ----whether you are extremely overwhelmed or at peace ---it all goes so quickly! Try not to feel guilty, try to enjoy every moment, and remember--- one day you'll be a grandparent and it's much, much easier! haha I remember that feeling as a parent, but although I'm busy this time of year, it's nothing like it was then!
I agree in so many ways! There never seems to be enough time.
On that note, I would love for all of us to get together for a play date. Maybe after the holidays? I know some cute babies that are having birthdays!
I'm totally feeling that. . . we're closing on our house and moving in, and somewhere in there I have finals to take! Holy Cow!
My poor baby! I wish I could be there to help you. But alas, like the rest of your friends who left comments, it is such an overwhelming life we live and juggling our time is just what we have to do. Please don't ever feel guilty about the time or lack there of as to how much you should be spending with Charlie. You, young lady, are an incredible person and Charlie knows it. Now if I can convince you, then all will be right with the world! Love You!
Dogs are awesome. You can put them in the backyard or in their crate when you're busy. Then, when you're ready, they're so excited to play! Unconditional love. Good times.
Hang in there champ. You're a "doer." I know it will all work out.
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