Bowman West

What was THE moment that you just knew?

Andy took the day off from work today to get the nursery painted, house arranged, leaves raked, etc. That means that when I woke up this morning there he was sound asleep next to me, and I couldn't help but smile and thank God for allowing me to wake up next to this wonderful man. As I watched him sleep I began to think back to one of the most agonizing day of my life--the 24 hours between the time that I really realized that I loved him (was in love with him, would always be in love with him, and I couldn't not tell him anymore) and the time that I tried to gather the courage to tell him.

It was the beginning of our senior year at ACU when we made the trip to Arlington for his sister Kristy's wedding. On the way there Friday afternoon, I began to feel really sick and continued that way until the ride home on Sunday. That means that I was a pittiful mess for the rehearsal dinner and the wedding ceremony, both which I barely made it to. I couldn't gather enough strength for the reception so they graciously loaned me a car and I went back to Andy's folks' house and crawled in bed while Andy and everyone else went to the reception. Andy was so concerned about me and was devestated that I couldn't go to the reception at the Ballpark's Diamond Club to celebrate with his family. I was devistated too, but I knew that Andy needed to be with his family and I wouldn't have had it any other way. I was asleep when Andy came home early by himself to take care of me. He got me some water, a cold rag for my head, and he layed down in the other twin bed next to mine in his little sister's bedroom and held my hand until everyone else got home. On the way back to Abilene the next day, I couldn't stop thinking about how he took care of me, the time with his family that he had sacrificed for me, and how much he must have loved me (although we hadn't said it yet!). That trip got very quiet with all that thinking! I couldn't get rid of the pit in my stomach that was yelling, "You have to tell him you love him! If you don't, you're a liar!" I was a nervous wreck. I never understood the agony of love before. It's when I realized that things would never be the same. When we got back he dropped me off at my house, he realizing that something was wrong but me assuring him that I was fine. I sat at my house for about twenty minutes before I nearly broke down in tears and knew that I had to call him. "Andy, I know you just dropped me off, but I really need to you come over. We need to talk about something." He said ok and headed over. I'm sure he was scared to death that we were about to break up. We went to Diamond Lake, a place right by my house where we often went to talk. We sat there in his truck and I started babbling about who knows what, and I started crying. I just couldn't get the words out. I had never felt this before, had never said this before, and was unsure of what it would mean for our future. Being the intelligent man that he is, he picked up on this, turned my head to face his, and said, "Amy, I love you." He said it first. I said it next. Then I told him that one day we would get married and have kids. He laughed and said, "Probably." Told you so, Andy!
So, here we are today, blessed beyond belief and more in love than we could have ever imagined. I know, it's a long story, and maybe you have one of your own and maybe you don't. If you do or if you don't, I urge you to dream of it, remember it, and tell of it because it's truly an amazing gift that God gives in it!