Bowman West

Saved by a Chick-Fil-A Napkin

It seems like our Charlie thinks he’s pretty hot stuff these days. Some days I seriously think about listing him on Craigslist [Little Naughty 3-Year-Old Needs a More Patient Mother – can deliver]. Yesterday was one of those days. Charlie woke up in a fury, like he does most days, jumping on my bed, barking loudly pretending to be a puppy, harassing me about “private parts” and being all touchy while I’m trying to get dressed – just to name a few of his current quirks. After spending all morning trying to get bills paid, our calendar sorted out, paperwork organized, etc. we were both ready for a break. I suggested we head for Chick-Fil-A, envisioning a relaxing lunch followed by plenty of play time and a worn-out nap-taking Charlie. I might not be able to see Andy on our anniversary (he was working all day and night) but at least I could enjoy our offspring and get all sappy about it. So after wrestling Charlie into some decent clothes and getting him into the car we headed off.
When we arrived the crowd wasn’t too bad and it was a fundraising day for a group that supports military families, so we donated a dollar and got to spin the wheel for a free food item. We landed on hash browns, and although I really wanted a milkshake I never scoff at a fried potato product. We ordered our food and sat down at a booth. It all started off fine but rapidly declined when the lunchtime crowd grew and the fundraising efforts escalated as an employee took it upon herself to continually yell and ring a cowbell and be generally obnoxious. It was chaotic.
While all this was happening in the background Charlie engaged in his usual display of horrible table manners, continually standing in his seat, jumping around, crawling under the table, chasing flies around the room, etc. He used to do great at restaurants but now it’s always a toss-up. This time was not working in my favor. I warned him once that if he didn’t sit nicely and eat his chicken he wouldn’t get to play on the playground. Of course he ignored me and I had to inform him that we were going straight home when we finished our lunch. When it got to the point that we (I) needed to be done I started to load his french fry crumbs and bits of chicken onto the tray to go to the trash. Charlie proceeded to grab the fries, dump them on the table and fling them around. Trying to keep my cool I grabbed them back and put them on the tray. Then he grabbed a piece of chicken and threw it against the wall. LORD HAVE MERCY! Craigslist, here we come! I kindly escorted Charlie to the restroom where my hand explained to his bottom why his actions were unacceptable. [And I'm theoretically anti-spanking. UGH!!]
Now Charlie was beside himself that he would be punished for just doing whatever he pleases and he entered full blown tantrum mode. All I could think was…EVACUATE! I quickly cleaned up our table and walked to the trashcan. As I was walking, a man sitting next to us handed me a folded napkin. I thought, “What a patronizing jerk. I’ve already cleaned everything up. What, does he think I can’t handle this or something?” As I gave him a puzzled look he said, “You might want to look inside.” For a second I thought there better be money in there since that’s the only thing that would make it better. With my hands full and still wrangling my screaming kid I opened the napkin…

You’re a great mom! Keep up the good work.

Wow. Mr. Man, whoever you are, you have no idea how much I needed that! I quickly said thanks, threw my stuff away (accidentally tossing the napkin in with it right in front of the guy – oops!) and headed outside. It was because of that napkin and ONLY that napkin that I didn’t shove Charlie in the next minivan that approached the drive thru saying, “You can keep him.” So Charlie, you now owe your life to a guy who cared enough to scribble a message on a Chick-Fil-A napkin and hand it to a much frazzled mom. You should thank him.

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And Happy Anniversary to my main man! I don't think I could have designed a better partner for myself if I tried -- God sure knew what He was doing! I mean, there is the small issue of Andy's perpetual underwear pile under the bedroom mirror instead of in the dirty clothes but I'm horrible at doing laundry anyway so it all evens out. Andy is crazy smart, hard-working, loyal, trustworthy, HOT!, funny, snuggly, loving, kind, respectful, and all-around wonderful. I hardly know why he even puts up with me most of the time. It's certainly not for my housekeeping skills! It must be for my superior travel-planning and packing skills. Whatever it is, I'm blessed to be married to a wonderful husband and father. I hope Charlie grows up to be exactly like him!