Weights on My Mind
It's 3:00 pm and normally I'd tune in to see if Oprah was worth watching today, but I've got a few things on my mind. I'm sitting here looking at my precious, perfect little Charlie asleep in his swing (again, thanks for letting us use it Grandma!) and I've got a few questions and concerns.
1. Andy really wants to start putting Charlie in the nursery at church because he feels that he's a distraction. In all honesty, he is. No offense to our talented teachers and preachers, but I'd rather stare at my precious boy 24/7 than do just about anything else. Andy on the other hand, while head over heels for his son, is really into learning and taking notes and it's difficult to do while managing a baby. So, to all the parents out there, when did you start leaving your baby in the church nursery? Did you just drop them off or include instructions, or what? I know it's a little irrational but I hate the thought of just leaving him there with people he doesn't know. It breaks my heart to think that I won't be there to comfort him when he cries. I'm such a sap!
2. This brings me to my next issue--going back to work. I'll be working half-days in June as I go back to teaching at Tech, and while I realize that I'm very blessed to still only be working half-days, I'm still dreading leaving him with someone else for that long. I'm going to miss him so much. Any advice on how to cope? We still haven't arranged childcare for him yet. We're considering having someone come to the house and watch him. Any suggestions on how to "prepare" that person?
On a lighter note, Charlie found his tongue yesterday. Andy and I were sitting there playing with him and he stuck out his tongue. While this might seem trivial to some, it was a big milestone for us since he wouldn't have been able to do it had we not had his frenulum clipped few weeks ago. It's amazing what thrills me these days!
10 comments:
Awww...siser. Don't put him in the nursery yet! I think Andy should let you just keep Charlie if you enjoy him being with you. Let Andy pay attention if he wants. Babies grow so quickly, so keep him every minute that you can. If you don't mind taking care of him, then keep him with you. I'd only take him to the nursery if he begins to become a distraction to others. I've noticed that if babies are always taken to the nursery, they never really learn to behave in church. Also, speaking from experience at all of the churches I've been to, they pretty much let anyone work in the nursery. You have to be prepared to let ANYONE take care of him and be responsible for him. If I were you, I'd wait. Just sit at the end of an aisle, near a door so that you can take him out if he starts to distract others.
I have thoughts on all of this, but I don't want to blog them. We can chat in person some time.
I can say that the nursery coordinator at Broadway is paid and has been doing it for a long time.
I do work and it has blessed my motherhood in lots of ways and been hard in others. Sometimes I think I am a better mom to Carley on weekdays because I have been away from her and I give her lots of QUALITY time when I am with her. I also put her on a routine to take her naps while we are apart and to be awake when we are together. Some weekends I enjoy the QUANTITY of time, but I am not very good at making it quality. It is SO hard to leave your baby with others. It is good for them though. I just leave cell phone numbers, lists of routines and activities, Mylecon drops, and pacifiers and LOTS of prayers.
We do keep Carley with us and just sit where we can slip out if she cries. Right now I like to hold her because we are apart during the week. However, I don't get much out of the lesson.
There aren't any right answers. Just do what works for you. If you take Charlie and miss him, you can always go get him in 5 minutes. There isn't a time length you have to leave him AND just because you do it once, doesn't mean you have to the next week.
It is hard b/c I am not ready to leave Carley, but I also know that I have thought to myself of others, those babies are too loud and need to go to the nuresery, they are a distraction. I don't want to disrupt other with Carley. I just love cuddling her! :) Let me know when you figure it out.
I don't think I'll ever figure it out! I do feel good knowing that bway is blessed with some wonderful ladies who work in the nursery. I would totally trust them.
As for me, I prefer people to keep their children during church for the same reasons April stated and also because I love staring at them and making them a distraction by sticking out my tongue and so on...It keeps me busy. You know, I've never been that good at listening. LOL. Kidding
Also, as an Assistant Director of a Private Preschool...if you are going to start looking for childcare for Charlie...start here.. http://www.dfps.state.tx.us/Child_Care/Local_Child_Care_Licensing_Offices/default.asp
It will have in-home care places as well as "daycares"...throughly look at them, if they have any violations and so on. Let me know if I can help.
Y'all are very blessed at Broadway to have a paid nursery coordinator. I didn't realize that was the case when I made my first comment. My church has a coordinator, but she basically just makes sure that there are warm bodies in the rooms when the babies get dropped off. There's no training or experience requirement when it comes to who takes care of the babies. They let anybody back there. That makes me uncomfortable, and I don't even have a baby!
It's also easy for me to say "keep Charlie with you all the time" because I'm not a mom. I'd love to have him with me all the time because he's not with me all the time (does that make sense?). I don't know why I try to give parenting advice...I really don't have a clue. :)
No April, you're right. I do want him with me all the time. The times I want a break are usually around 5:00 pm, not on Sunday mornings. The other thing is that the three of us don't get tons of time together as a family during the week so I really want to protect the time that we do have. Church and worship is more about relationships to me and Andy really enjoys the academic side (shocker!). He gets distracted by Charlie but having him there with us enhances my worhsip experience. I want to share all that with him. Really my biggest concern is that I don't want him to be a distraction to others.
I think I waited until 6-7 months with both of my kids for nursery time. As for being distracting, I hate to tell you but my kids are 3 1/2 and 1 1/2 and you sat behind us a few Sunday's ago. They will be distracting probably for their whole childhood. In fact, I probably think it gets more so the more you have and the older they get. Babies at least sleep sometime. Mike and I joke that we haven't heard a sermon in almost 4 years. My mom used to say she went to church when we were little just so people would know what side she was on. You are doing great! These are the fun decisions.
We were never at a church with a nursery and I enjoyed having y'all with me, although as it was said I didn't get to hear much of the sermon. I always felt undressed or something if y'all weren't there with me, just like if your dad and I would go someplace and the conversation would be, "I wonder what the kids are doing?" or "Sure wish the kids were here to see this!" Amy, don't let anyone make this decision for you. You do what feels right for you. Time is going by so fast it is truly unbelievable and before you know it, you will be like us. Older, the kids gone, grandkids and missing them all so much it hurts sometimes. I even still have my crying times feeling so lonely without y'all. Like now I'm already tearing up just thinking about it. Gotta go. Love ya.
I have no advice since I'm not there yet. I just wanted to say I am enjoying your questions and everyone's comments b/c I know these are things I will be faced with soon.
Since I am SOOO experienced in motherhood...I think I will sit this one out. the end.
wait....i need charlie during church purely for entertainment. its a must. i have a short attention span...
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